First, you have to ask yourself, do you really want him/her back? Is it worth the salvation? If no, then you can ignore this and move on to the next thing that makes you happy. Movies, trips, yoga, anything! But if yes, then you have to analyze a thing or two, why you broke up? Did he break up with you? Or was it you who ended it? Was there a third party?
Now you have to take a moment to reflect what was the scenario that you experienced through your breakup. Now let us check some strategy that you might want to consider…
EVALUATE THE RELATIONSHIP
I know one thing for sure, you are hurting, but it would be safe to put aside your bias feeling and evaluate what happened to the relationship. It is easy to blame the other party, that is something usual. It is so hard to focus post-breakup, but you have to be honest to yourself about what went wrong? What was your behavior? And so on and so forth.
NO CONTACT RULE
Especially, if he/she was the one who broke up with you. Give yourself a favor, stay away from them as much as possible. Forget them and focus on yourself. Yes, it is easier said than done. But it will be worth it. What will happen (some of the time) they will miss you. Vanish from their lives, you can’t in any way force the person to see what they’ve given up. If it’s meant to be, they will start missing you. And it would be perfect timing as well to clear your head and figure what you really want.
LET YOURSELF GRIEVE
There are five stages of grief. Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance. I can’t tell you how long you will experience each stage. But one thing is for sure, it is necessary and important that you experience them and get through them. Following it can only benefit you. There is no getting around it. Whatever stage you might be right now, FEEL and EXPERIENCE it.
LET GOOD ENERGY IN
A lot of bad vibes surrounding a breakup. Dry eyes, eyebags, no appetite because your emotions are eating you up. ALIVE. You can’t sleep. Now go back to No Contact Rule, Fabulous Human Being! Start there and you are on your way on getting your sh*t together. Surround yourself of happy, positive and good energy. No matter what it is, just do it and be you again. And stay hydrated.
FIND YOURSELF AND YOUR IDENTITY
Human as we are, we tend to be lost in a relationship. We spent so much time in a relationship that we lost our own identity. It is natural that we change a little when we have a partner. We subdue one aspect of our personality in an effort to align it with our partner. But the truth is if you find the right person, he will want you, in full blast. So take time, if you are lost, find your way back to yourself.
Now, Human, I don't want you to think that all of the things above will gonna get your man/lady back. I don't even know if that person is right for you. But what I am trying to emphasize is you cant have someone back or even have someone new in your life, if you didn't get enough time to get yourself back together. Because the truth is when you are whole again, when you are full of self-love, you will never need someone to love you because you are enough. So yes, what I am saying the best way to have someone back, is to have yourself back first.